I know I have mostly been doing poetry.
I am rediscovering my ability to play with phrases and finding a deep appreciation in it.
But, today, I feel more like just pulling up a metaphorical chair and talking a bit.
Such as my talking goes…
I was just sitting here thinking about imagination.
Autists are stereotyped as being nothing but logic.
I have a certain measure of logic, I suppose. I have even been accused of being overly practical. 🙂
But, I am also quite prone to flights of fancy…
Something that often prompted the nagging queries growing up-
“Are you in there?”
Because, like as not, something was being expected of me when I was floating off on some cloud somewhere or maybe a train easing down the line, awaiting mysteries to unfold-perfectly appointed in my classic tweed suit and sweeping hat, of course.
Or, sometimes, on a riverboat listening to the paddlewheel turning and maybe some rakish gambler wooing me down the mighty Mississippi.
I was much fed by old books and black and white films. 🙂
I don’t know quite how this side of me figures into the spectrum, exactly.
I do not consider myself extraordinarily gifted in many respects.
But, I do feel in many ways my struggles growing up with outright cruelty on one hand and complete ignorance on the other, were shored up by this ability to escape-at least, for a while.
My imagination was always my gift.
Often, it still is. I have needed it so many times, even in recent days of near exhaustion and tears.
Yet, it is such a tricky, slippery thing. I unwittingly irritate loved ones and strangers alike drifting off in a daydream.
And I find I have yet to figure out how to parlay these notions of mine into anything truly significant as others seem to be able to do.
Writing is lovely but it can all too fast become commercial.
Most arts can be the same way.
Or at least, to me, that is what they have proven to be.
There’s days I can get downright depressed about it.
And I wish for a different sort of mind untroubled about such things.
But, then, something sparks a fantastical thought.
And I once again enjoy my mind for what it is.
The world has no clue how amazingly deep the spectrum really is, do they?
What a pity all they miss when they categorize us so narrowly.
Would that I could stay in my bright, happy place longer!
But, reality beckons…Sigh.
Sadly, time to put away my chair for now.
Good talk. Sorry if I rambled. Thanks for lending an ear.