Big, Big thank you’s to my dear friend Laina at The Silent Wave! Words can never fully express the wonder it has been to find you and realize there are others like me!❤❤❤❤

The Rules:

  1. Thank the blogger who nominated you and provide a link to their blog.
  2. Write a post to show your award.
  3. Give a brief story of how your blog started.
  4. Give two pieces of advice to new bloggers.
  5. Select 15 other bloggers for this award.
  6. Comment on each blog to let them know you’ve nominated them and a link to the post you created.

The Tangled Web That is My Blogging History:   (Get ready.  My profound apologies. I know it says brief, but my journey has many twists. 😉)

I stumbled on blogging back in 2013. I am an avid researcher, particularly when something is in my craw, so to speak. Well, I had several issues poking at me-surprisingly none of them autism at that point, though, with two of my kids diagnosed, it was certainly a daily presence! 

I started out on WordPress just reading. The more I read, the more I kept itching to revive my long-buried dreams of writing. BUT, I was determined not to be the typical “mommy” blogger and did not yet feel there was room for my voice concerning autism. 

So…I wrote about my odd and varied experiences in my faith. That fizzled fast as I really, really had no clue how to get my blog visible then. So…I dismissed the whole idea for several months. 

But, as with many of my ideas, writing nagged at me. I revisited, retitled, revamped. And I began to blog on my struggles-self-esteem issues, abuse, abandonment, remarriage, faith, and the occasional autism article-though I was determined yet not to be one of “those” moms. 

Took a long while, but, slowly, I gained some followers. I even began to entertain thoughts of paid freelance writing. I entertained. Publishers did not.  😏  What had begun as a release became a frustration as I saw others thrive in a way I could not.

Finally, it became too much to continue. I said goodbye, backed up the best of my work, and deleted my blog.

But, I was not entirely done writing…of course! 😉After a rest, I returned to submitting and began tinkering away on the “big project”- a full, actual book.

I was finally ready to share my insights on autism!

Lots of  “no’s” later, I finally got a couple of “yes’s” on articles. Yay! Couldn’t believe it.

I got my book done, took a deep breath, and started submitting.

Lots and lots of “no’s” later, I was stunned one day by a “yes”. Whoa. Really couldn’t believe it.

The only problem? I was still so unknown. I had abandoned blogging. I would have to rebuild. Gather readers. Start the promoting game, as per publisher’s expectations.

So…back to blogging, the new edition. More focused. More careful crafting. Don’t forget the cute anecdotes about family life and the pitch for book sales.

Sigh. And all the while, my own search was going on. My feelings had been all over the place in the last several years. I was tired of the struggle and wondering what was going on with me.

I had always identified with my kids’ experiences but never dared to think there was a deeper reason why.

It took time, but, finally, I looked deep enough into the reflection to recognize my own autism. Took every test I could find. Started to discover answers about myself at long last.

But, the book wasn’t about that, I was reminded. Stick to the kids’ stories, touch on all you overcame, but shut up about all this new discovery biz.

Sales are stinky. Why can’t you do the appearances, push yourself out there more?

Oh, the pressure. The expectations! Couldn’t keep bearing it.

So…I started Cocoons to vent what I could not there.

Heaven! No statistics. No peddling my wares!

But, I intended to keep both going. Really did. I knew it would be unwise to shut down the ongoing commercial I had going. There was obligation to consider.

But, I soon found it just wasn’t going to work to juggle both. It was proving not worth it. I also began to feel as if my privacy and my children’s privacy had the potential of being sacrificed for sales’ sake.

So…back to wiping out yet another blog for mental health and now, for my loved ones’ mental health.

But, this time, I had my cocoon. I had a group of folks gathering round me that got it. I had my much-coveted anonymity.

So…I have been stepping forward these past several months, letting it all spill out-reawakening my inner poet, allowing my confessionals without fear of rebuke, and even one sketch. ( That felt good, even if I know I am no Van Gogh. I do hope to do more as my hands permit.)

Well…that long spiel brings us to now. I hope to continue as long as ya’ll can stand me! 😉 And probably will on this blessedly anonymous basis-even if only the crickets commune with me! I have been full-circle and this is where it’s at for me! 

Two Pieces of Advice For New Bloggers…

  1. Don’t be afraid to get your voice out there. You never know who will echo back, “Me, too!”
  2. Be true to you. Even when that means starting from scratch when something is no longer working. 😉 How you feel about you matters more than numbers on the statistics page!

Nominated Bloggers…

Oy. Toughest part. Sounds awful, but I don’t always chime in a lot on every blog or follow many these days. It isn’t that I am not moved by others’s work. Definitely am. It is just that my purpose on here has somewhat been reinvented. My goal is less follow/gain follow backs than just give my thoughts a landing place. 🙂 So…I have a very small, selective group of blogs I follow anymore. Laina’s list very nearly matches my own, actually, with a couple of exceptions I plan to check out when I can! 😉  So, rather than double the nominations, I hope it does not seriously break protocol to just leave this area blank save one dear friend I cannot neglect to add:

Devereaux Frazier, Creative Writing of a Teenage Aspergian.