An autistic brain I can find much to celebrate in. EDS? Not so much. But, still, somehow, we find strength and brightness to push forward in. My hands were hurting like hell, but I wanted to cover the whole page with color…
Feels like every day
Another thing I could do
Pain rises up
With a wicked grin
And seeks to master me.
Limbs and lungs
Seem every moment ready
To give way and break,
Along with my weary heart,
As the person I was,
Inadequate as she always appeared,
Begins to further shrink,
As I become lesser physically even than I feared…
But, yet, I must press on to conquer,
If not the pain,
Then, perhaps, a way to seize
Joy yet inside my brain.
I could sit by and curse the Creator’s prerogative.
And I do let sadness in, but to rise up from it?
In autists’ unique and varied shades
I will determinedly color the night
And in this, I will brave beyond the black
And bathe in the light…